I needed to add this story here because Facebook is awkward for any kind of storytelling. And I really just want all my baby’s stories in one place.
If you’re more of a visual person, here’s the link to his birth video.
But this note from September 22, 2011 gives the backstory:
“I figured it’s about time to tell Colin’s story (now that he’s over six months old!) and even though I could write hundreds of pages with tons of details, I think I’ve finally figured out the highlights. To begin, I have a son named Colin. An obvious statement to some of you, but that sentence is still miraculous. Let me tell you why…
Eric and I were unable to have kids. Infertile. After being married for nine years, it was pretty obvious. We had gone through all the tests with no results. By that I mean, there was nothing wrong at all. As far as the doctors and diagnostic tools were concerned, we were both completely normal. So, we talked off and on about adoption – I didn’t want fertility treatments (they didn’t know what to treat!) – and we waited. I graduated from college two weeks before our ninth anniversary and after all the celebrations were over, we felt like the final goal had been achieved. Now what?
Fast forward three months and I fell apart crying in front of my boss. For some reason, being surrounded by pregnant girls – my friends! – had finally reached something that it never had before. My boss asked if our pastors and directors could pray for me. I agreed because I thought I wanted direction: adoption or not. Having children of our own “wasn’t” an option.
When I met with our church leaders, they didn’t immediately pray for guidance for us. Instead, they had me tell our story. Married for years, no children, nothing physically wrong and we weren’t sure what to do now. Two of our pastors made statements that I remember best from that day. The first – after hearing that I wasn’t distraught over not having kids – said that he thought God told him something to tell me. He said he thought of a big lock with a keyhole that was buried deep down. He then said decisively, “It’s time for the lock to be unlocked.” The second asked if children had been a joy in our families. I thought about the stress, work and challenges they had seemed to be, but the joy wasn’t a part of our growing up years. The reality that children could be a joy had never occurred to Eric or I before that day!
Then, I’ll never forget what another pastor said right before they prayed. “Kate, I don’t think the issue is adoption or not. I think we need to ask God to open your womb. Are you ready for that?” I was dumbfounded. Of course I would love a baby, but hadn’t they heard? That just wasn’t going to happen. I don’t remember the exact words that were said, except that every person who prayed for me asked God to give me a child. I still don’t know why I doubted – “God gives good gifts to his children” – but I felt like this was beyond the realm of possibility. Wouldn’t we have children already if we were supposed to? But, there was something indescribable and sacred in the room that day. I cried when each person laid a hand on my shoulder or back or arm and made requests on my behalf. That deep-buried lock seemed to be unearthed and something like hope started to form.
Then, life went on like normal. Well, similar to normal. I began looking at things a little differently and felt like something still needed to happen. Then, six weeks later, on a normal Sunday morning, I gave up. I told God that I was done trying to do my life on my own and that He could really take over. Not just part, but everything. I’d been hearing about the baptism of the Holy Spirit for over three years and decided that it was time to hand over the reins of my life to God. He was going to be in charge now. The physical changes were subtle, nothing like those “crazy charismatic people” who shake and fall down. Instead, I felt like, if peace was water, it poured all over me and just settled there. And that was it. I told people who asked about the experience that I was “expecting exciting things to happen.” But I really had no idea what those things would be.
Now, my personality is such that I could have easily have dismissed the experience. But, that week, I didn’t even realize another change had taken place:
I was pregnant.
A month later, when we finally realized the change and traced it back, the timing couldn’t be explained away. The very week I gave up and gave God control of everything was the very same week our baby was conceived! We spread the news early and often, giving little tidbits of the story along the way. I never felt fear during my pregnancy, but an overwhelming peace throughout his whole 9 1/2 months “on the inside.” Even when he was two weeks late and I felt like I had been pregnant forever, I wasn’t in a hurry.
Then, a miraculous, natural birth, that so many people had prayed for, happened without a hitch! My water broke early one Tuesday morning and after just 5 1/2 hours, our baby was born. I cried, “It’s a boy!” and we were off and running down a road we’d never thought possible. The whole story plays over and over in my mind – almost daily – and I’m still in awe of what God has done for us. I think the best part is that neither Eric or I did anything to deserve the blessings that were heaped all over us – it was like God kept saying, “And, why don’t I give this to you too?” There are so many, in fact, that I would have to write all night to list them all.
But the best part is, I sit here tonight, with my son – MY SON – sleeping in the next room.
“My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior… for the Mighty One has done great things for me – holy is his name.”
And that my friends, is Colin’s story.”
I also told my story more in depth for our church’s focus on healing and prayer a few years ago. Colin’s conception and birth was truly the first step on an amazing journey of faith, miracles and purpose.